Who am I?

No.. i'm not talking about the Jackie Chan show.. nor am i'm talking about mayday song... but truely "Who am I?"

I remember a few years back my current boss (than he was my colleague) make the statement about my friend and I, saying that who are we to know him when he doesn't even understand himself. I used to believe that his theory is correct. Since I'm the only one who is with myself 24 hours a day since the day i was born. Not even my family members are with me 24 hours a day. So who is others to come tell me who i am.

But as the years pass, i start to question. Is this true? Do I know myself much better then my family members and friends? Do I really do? Actually, I don't think so. My family members and friends probably have a better idea who I am then myself. Why? Because I only see matters in one perspective, tat is my perspective. But different family members and friends will be able to see things in their perspective, hence giving myself another "identity".

I remember a few years back I read a book from 吳淡如. She talks about facial violence (表情暴力). Wat is tat? Here is the rough story I remember. There was this day in an office a game is being played to help colleagues understand each other. So what the staff need to do is to draw up a picture of what they they think they are in the eyes of their colleagues. So there is this lady she draw a very nice and sweet cake, cos she think she is a very nice person. When her colleagues approach her for help she will never reject them, so she think she is a nice and sweet person. However, when everyone saw her pic, they were all very disapproving. They did not think that she is such a person. Why? Because she suffer from facial violence. Yes, no doubt when pple approach her, she will help. However, she did not accept the job with a happy face. In the exact opposite, she sometimes sulk and show a "black face" to others unknowingly. This is call facial violence, cause you are causing harm to others through your facial expressions. (Of course the logic is not to not show ur unhappiness, but rather if you are unwilling then do not do it.. do not force yourself to do things for others. however, if you do accept, accept it with a happy mood.)

This is a classic example of others knowing better then you. To this lady, she may think that she is an easy going person, but is she really? So she knows herself better then her colleagues? In certain aspect, yes. But in others no. We know ourself, but not in every aspects. Sometimes its better to listen to others.

So Who Am I?